Roses Are Red, This Love Is Dead
Let’s cut the Hallmark crap for a second: How many couples stumbling down the Valentine’s aisle are actually in love?
I’m talking about the ‘Staying together for the kids’ not-in-love? The ‘We are more like hostile roommates’ not-in-love? The ‘I think we should break up but I don’t have the guts to pull the plug‘ not-in-love? Or the ‘I fantasize about you leaving for a gallon of milk and never coming back’ not-in-love.
Imagine the masses, shoving their relationships through the meat grinder of overpriced, underwhelming Valentine’s Day experiences. Picture two people who can barely stand the sight of each other forced to share ‘a magical night out’ in a restaurant so packed you’re basically dining with four other couples at your table. There’s nothing like spending three hours and half your paycheck to gnaw on a steak tougher than the conversation.
And then, there’s the Valentine’s Day breakup. Is it the worst time to break up with someone, or the most honest?
Why wait a week and pretend like everything’s fine, when you can just rip off the Band-Aid with a side of overpriced chocolates and wilting roses?
“I don’t want to be the bad guy in someone else’s story”. You are GOING TO anyway! If you’re out there thinking of chopping the cord on V-Day… maybe you are not the monster. Maybe you are a saint, someone who’s finally ready to stop pretending. Live the truth. Because if there’s anything more depressing than a Valentine’s Day breakup, it’s the thought of spending one more second in a loveless charade, choking down another bite of that overcooked steak that is your relationship.